We all have struggled at some time or the other by comparing ourselves with others. Right from our childhood days, we have been compared, either with our siblings or our peers. This has become so engraved in our lives that people often experience low self-esteem, low self-confidence and other things. In this article we show you How To Stop Comparing Yourself To Others.
Many parents commit the mistake of either comparing their child with others or with their siblings and this process carries on for life. Many experts and psychologists have warned that these comparisons can have a negative impact on our children’s lives. When these children grow up into adults they experience low self-esteem, negativity, lack of love and low self-confidence.
How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
Let us understand how can we stop comparing ourselves with others.
1. Consciously be aware of your own successes and strengths.
Self-affirmation and being aware of one’s own strength is one of the key things in building our self-confidence. Appreciate and think about your own unique talents, hobbies, experiences, God given gifts etc. Think of your own successes in the past and appreciate them.
God has uniquely made each individual with a purpose and he has given everyone talents and gifts to achieve that purpose in life. Your talents are unique and so you should not feel threatened by other peoples talents and achievements. Once you are consciously aware of this fact, then you will stop comparing yourself to others.
Further parents should encourage and appreciate their children for their unique talents and strengths. Stop comparing two siblings or stop comparing your child with others. The negative effects of comparing are very high in this competitive world.
2.Try and get inspired by others without any comparison.
This is one of the most difficult but not impossible thing to do. Try and be happy for others in their achievements and get inspired by them. It is wise to get inspired and learn new and valuable things from others. Work hard towards achieving your goals.
Read good autobiographies, positive articles and stories which will motivate you to move ahead in life. Stop complaining and comparing yourself to others. I love this stop comparing quote, “Comparison is a thief of Joy “ by Teddy Roosevelt.
3. Compete less and pursue greater things in life.
In this fast moving world, most of us have forgotten to value the real treasures in life. It is very important to pursue great treasures like love, happiness, contentment, humility, empathy, generosity and kindness. Pursuing these things will bring peace and joy in your life.
It is also important to know that we need to compete less and help compliment each other. This attitude will help us to stop complaining and also stop comparing ourselves with others.
4. Compare yourself to You and motivate yourself to do better.
We all have our own strengths and weakness. We need to inspire and motivate ourselves to work on our weaknesses in order to make ourselves better. There is always scope for improvement in our attitude and behaviour.
Do not be harsh on yourself but strive hard to improve and make yourself a better person. Every day make an effort to grow and celebrate these small achievements. This will helps us to stop complaining and comparing ourselves with others.
5. Remember we are not perfect.
Nobody in this world is perfect and so it important to focus on our positive habits and not be too critical of our faults. Everyone has to face many challenges in life, both big and small. It is by overcoming these challenges that we will find satisfaction and a sense of achievement. Respect and appreciate others achievements as you would appreciate your own.
6. Express gratitude and count your blessings.
Practicing gratitude always helps us to recognise and appreciate the good things in life. Whenever you are tempted to compare yourself with others, start counting your blessings one by one. You will realize how much God has blessed you. These blessings that you take for granted are illusive to so many people in the world. Make an effort to consciously think of all the blessings and God given gifts and start thanking God. This will help you to stop complaining and stop comparing yourself with others.
You should also stop comparing your child with other children. Comparing siblings can lead to many issues –
- Comparing children is stressful to the children themselves.
- Stop comparing your child with others as it will damage their relationship with you.
- Comparing always focuses on weaknesses rather than strengths, which is not good for children or anybody.
- Comparing two siblings or children will not help a child to excel in their own skills and personality.
- Comparing children will not give children the freedom to develop at their own pace.
- Comparisons are unfair and you tend to only lose and not gain anything.
- Comparisons result in resentment, bitterness and deprives us of our joy.
- Comparisons are always short term and do not help to focus on the long term goals.
- It lowers the self-esteem and self-confidence of the child.
- It fosters sibling rivalry.
- It suppresses their inherent talent and this leads to demotivation.
- It leads to self doubt, jealously and negativity.
Therefore it is important to stop comparing yourself to others. Also, avoid comparing your children or siblings and build a healthy and positive environment for you and your children. Though it is impossible to completely remove comparisons from our lives, yet we can make an effort to consciously focus more on our strengths and abilities rather than on our weaknesses. Support and show unconditional love to each other and you will see the best in people around you.
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